A Lapsed Catholic on Pope John Paul and His Church

The ceaseless and uncritical media coverage of Pope John Paul’s death and funeral rites are driving this lapsed Catholic crazy! The endless encomiums about his virtue and good works and selflessness and blah, blah, blah are just too much. So how about this for an alternative view?

First, I should point out that I was baptized Catholic (it was coerced, I was only two weeks old!) and attended a Catholic grade school for eight years in the 1960s. There’s no question that I got a superior education there from the strict and often dotty nuns. I was way ahead of fellow students when I got to a public junior high and spent my high school years bored out of my mind.

But the catechism imposed on us youngsters at St. Mary’s (in Elm Grove, Wisconsin) was problematic to me from an early age. A precocious tot, I did the one thing little Catholics weren’t supposed to do: I asked questions – mostly “Why?” I cannot tell you how many times the nuns whacked me or the priest yelled at me for daring to challenge them. The pastor at St. Mary’s, who the nuns treated like a god but who reminded me of my shambling, alcoholic father at home, would bellow at me: “BELIEVE AND OBEY!”

“Believe and obey!” seemed to be the essence of Catholicism in the 1960s and apparently still is today. Problem is, in addition to my natural inquisitiveness, I was deeply impacted by the ‘60s ethos of challenging authority. I also loved history, and I was especially captivated by the period of the Enlightenment, when rationalism overcame superstition, and the peasants and middle classes and colonists everywhere began to challenge empires and the divine right of kings. How could anyone be expected to simply “believe and obey”?!

I had a difficult transition leaving the church in my teens. I was still living at home, of course, and there were often Sunday morning battles with Mom about my going to Mass. Once 18 and out on my own, I simply stopped going. I have no regrets and, despite all the threats and fear-mongering, have no fear for my immortal soul. The few times I’ve gone to church in the past 30 years, it seems the priest has launched into some homily about protecting embryos or lectured about some reactionary papal encyclical, only reinforcing my disaffection.

I have known nuns who were dynamite teachers and Catholics who were/are compassionate Christians. I know that some organs of the Catholic Church, particularly at the local level, are doing vital work in supporting oppressed communities. But I find much of the dogma (about holy spirits and virgin Marys and immaculate conceptions, etc.) just plain silly, and I am appalled by the conspicuous wealth, the institutionalized sexism, the archaic hierarchy, the ritualistic excess and the doctrinal hypocrisy of the Vatican superstructure. The pope runs that superstructure.

I agree that Pope John Paul should be recognized for his heroic stand against communist regimes. And I am grateful that he spoke out against war and capital punishment. But any balanced assessment of this pope and his church needs to include the following indictments as well.

What about the millions of women worldwide condemned to poverty, endless childbearing and physical debilitation by the Vatican’s cruel and deadly campaign against artificial birth control?
What about the millions who have died and will continue to die of AIDS – especially those in the third world – due to the Vatican’s irrational opposition to condoms?
What about the millions of gays and lesbians worldwide whom this pope’s Vatican has described as “intrinsically disordered” and who must endure all the discrimination and hatred that flow from that declaration?
What of the millions of Catholic women who are restricted from full participation in John Paul II’s church, permanently relegated to a secondary role?
And finally, what about the thousands of victims of pedophile priests, a sad but predictable result of the Vatican’s repressive and hypocritical view of human sexuality?

Maybe John Paul can rest in peace. But I’m not convinced he or his bishops can be absolved of these sins.